kallador's blog

Life Life we all live is a giant illusion, as we grow older we leave behind our childhood and enslaved to paper, politics, religion, and poison. Money, is an illusion created man to control man and the system has been in place for ever it is a paper that we are forced to be enslaved by.  To keep this system up we have to form things around it make it what people crave and if you don't have it you are on the corner begging for it. Politics, because everyone wants to be a leader and the ones who don't have to use money to buy off that political person who fakes being a leader to earn more of the paper illusion. These people leading people has always been there even though we are capable of leading ourselves and providing for ourselves. Religion, worst illusion we have in place today, it is no different than the politicians, it is in the greed to be the worlds king, some are plugged into the matrix where it is to a point of complete enslavement with the illusion of peace and n

I have been in a struggle for some time, since my diagnose with Non-Hodgkin Lymphoma B-Cell High Grade in 2003. Life has changed a lot of my perspective. Recently I was just thinking to myself and to really realize that my life has changed. Beyond the psychological and emotional consequences of how cancer affected me, my family, and my relationships, it is undeniable and abundantly clear that cancer took its toll on me from a physical & emotional perspective. Since 2003, it has been a rocky road for me, both physical and emotional. Since the cancer I have a rough luck with relationships, and emotionally it has made me feel like I don't need to exist, in which it makes me feel like I should have never survived the cancer because the hardships to find a companion is taken it's toll. Even when I was married with my ex wife would call me names to enrage the conflict even more to hurtfully gain a point in my life that left me feeling like I wished it would of never happened,